“Gator Jacked” & “Gravedigger” – Swamp People Season 5 Episode Overviews

Well, for all of you Swamp People fans out there, we collected a few quotes from David and Jeromy from Episode 3 called “Gator Jacked” (called so because thieves were cashing in on the swampers’ gators) just in case you missed it.

Before we get to those quotes though, Troy (called “Nunky” by Holden) and Holden had a great day. We think it’s so funny when Troy catches so many big gators that his boat looks like it is going to sink any minute. That was the case this time again and as they drove to the buyer’s at the end of the day, Troy was going real slow so as to stay above water.

Anyway, in this episode, Jeromy and David were on again and this time, it seems like they’re trying a little bit too hard with the weird quotes. It is possible that the television station is asking them to do that. In any case, here  are the quotes:

Jeromy: I’m fired up like a Tonka truck ready to get it.

Jeromy: Man, it is unbearable hot our here. I ain’t sweated this much since I said, “I do.”

Jeromy (after seeing a dead alligator going to waste in the water): That’s somebody that…didn’t have their mom and daddy whip their butt when they was growing up. That’s what that is.

Jeromy (getting to what he thought was way in the back Mr. Jimmy’s property): Alligator paradise. These alligators ain’t even never seen a person. I feel a little more confident. I’m startin’ to grin like a possum eatin’ cow crap.

Some of Jeromy’s efforts worked, and some of them didn’t…

Episode 4 was called “Gravedigger” (a gator was named Gravedigger by Roger Rivers because according to him, he had dug his own grave by being a cannibal gator who had also bent one of his No. 14 hooks). Roger Rivers is really annoying. He thinks way too much of himself and way too much about what he is doing. After all, he is just hunting alligators. History Channel must be trying to find the dumbest swampers so that their audience can laugh at how stupid they are. Troy was too smart. Willie and Junior were too smart. Bruce was too smart, etc. So they are having to find people who will bring them all down. Roger Rivers would be just the person to do that.

Junior’s new partner, at least until Theresa heals up, is named Dougie. He is pretty weird and Junior made a lot of funny faces, but in the end, they made a good team and Dougie did a great job. Willie came over to Junior’s house to check him out and they met again at the end of the day at the buyer’s. Willie, who has struck out on his own, only got 2 gators so Junior was happy since Dougie and he got 12.

Bruce had a bad day, forgetting his tags and having to go back home to retrieve them. Then, when he got back on the water, the tide had gone out and his bait was hanging too high. He was all alone because Ron was hung up with some family business and Tyler, his dog, is getting too old to go out with Bruce.

Swamp People is still a great show (for people who like this sort of thing), but some of the people make us kind of sick. Just give us Troy, Junior and Willie, Glenn, Bruce – all of the old people. They were the best. If you want to watch videos of Swamp People, here is a link to History.com.

Swamp People Season 5 Episodes 1 & 2

Tonight we watched the second episode from the fifth season of Swamp People. These first two episodes have shown most of the swamper’s starting day of the season. It looks like Bruce and Ron, Glenn, and Willie are among the only hunters who haven’t appeared yet. Maybe they’ll be in the next episode.

The first two episodes were good. We saw some of the old people like Junior and Troy, but we also saw some new people. Theresa is Junior’s wife and she is his hunting partner this season as Willie has struck out on his own. Junior & Theresa were doing well until Theresa got bitten by a gator they were pulling into the boat. The gator was shot, but it was still alive. Even though we never saw any blood, Junior said that it had bit clear through her left ring finger. Theresa might not be able to continue hunting and if she has to quit, Junior will have to find a new hunting partner.

Terrell is back from we think the second season. He is not one of our favorites. This season he has a hunting partner named Johnny. Johnny reminds us of a mothball and we are wondering if he has any teeth. Troy is partnering with his nephew Holden, 15. They look like they’re going to have a good season together. Jacob is hunting with Miss Marie until Chase gets back from a job in California. Miss Marie is a really good shot.

Then there is a new native American named Roger Rivers.We can’t remember his partner’s name. Before Roger starts hunting for alligators, he first gets a loggerhead turtle to do some Native American rituals to keep him safe for the season. We didn’t think too much about that and his partner didn’t look very impressed either. We hope he just sticks to alligator hunting in future shows.

RJ and Jay Paul are back, saying “bro” a lot and giving each other fist bumps. Liz and her daughter are partners again since Kristi got married and is apparently having a baby.

David and Jeromy are back as well, and as always, they are in a league of their own. On the 2nd episode, Jeromy was driving a motor house as they were going to drive south to Raceland, LA. Here is how Jeromy described it :

“We’re fixing to hit the road with this forty year old motor home, and I’m hoping it’s gonna make it. Can’t get in the bathroom cause the door’s broke right there. Have to go out in the woods. It don’t have no shocks on it so it bounces a lot. The refrigerator don’t work in there. It’s not a pretty sight, and it’s got a little smell. It ain’t got no air condition. You burn up. It’s hot. But it’s something for us to sleep in, keep us out of the rain.”

The 1st thing the boys did when they got to Raceland was to get an alligator out of a lake so that the owner of the lake would give them the 30 tags they went down there for in the 1st place. It was a cheap thing for that owner to do, but David and Jeromy got it eventually, after trying to bait it with sausage (David’s supper) and Cheetos.

The 1st two episodes were pretty good with some old with some new. As usual, we don’t like the new people very much. They have to grow on us for a season and some we never will like as much as others.

If you’ve never seen Swamp People, you can check it out here. It’s just one of the things we watch, even though they do the same thing week after week. It’s the same, but it’s different 🙂

David and Jeromy Catch the Beast of the East

On last week’s episode, called Beast of the East, David and Jeromy finally shot the [alleged] fourteen-foot long alligator that David had been trying to catch for 20 years. David claimed that it was longer than his boat and just as wide, though when they caught it, it didn’t seem quite that big. At the start of their day, they had only two tags left, so they were putting all the tricks they knew into their last two lines. They baited them with monkey milk and another bait so potent that David nearly threw up. However, even this did not lure the Beast of the East out of hiding. They only manged to catch a small female gator with all the rancid bait. Then Jeromy formed a plan that he was sure would help them catch the beast. He told David that they should use the female’s scent to lure in the gator. David himself had gotten sprayed by a female one time and then a bull gator came right up to him. There was no question about it; using the female’s scent would do the trick. So David and Jeromy soaked some cotton balls in a jar of the female alligator’s urine and proceeded to put them on trees near their bait line. The Beast of the East went after that, and David was able to shoot it with his revolver.

In the process of catching it, Jeromy wrangled with the beast while David poked the gator’s mouth with his bamboo pole. Speaking of which, I think it would be more effective to just shoot the thing as soon as you could. They say they do it to keep the alligator from jumping in the boat, but I can only recall one time when an alligator has actually jumped into somebody’s boat. I don’t think it’s necessary. But anyway, they’re the hunters, not me.

At the end of the show, Jeromy came over to David’s house with a present for him. He had cleaned the alligator’s head and bleached the skull. David looked very surprised and pleased, and I must say, it was nice of Jeromy. Unfortunately, History Channel never did give the measurements of The Beast of the East.

by Dink and John

Swamp People Episode #15: Lightning Strikes Overview

This week’s Swamp People episode contained a lot of good quotes, good information, and an old Mitchell family recipe and just in case you missed the show and are unable to watch it, here’s a basic overview.

First of all, the episode is called “Lightening Strikes” because the swampers face a thunderstorm, but hunt anyway because they have only nine days left in the hunting season. Bruce captures all of their attitudes by saying if they got struck by lightning, they wouldn’t know it anyway, so “it wouldn’t make any damn difference”.

David and Jeromy go to a remote channel that isn’t usually accessible, but because of the heavy rain, is that day. After a tiring struggle to catch a big 10-footer, Jeromy says “I almost messed in my britches”. Describing the hard rain, David remarks “It’s like a cow peeing on a flat rock” while Jeromy puts it this way, “That frigging rain is tearing my eyeballs up”. Later, these two get another twelve-and-a-half footer on a line, but they lose it and then proceed to get angry and blame each other for the loss.  They eventually start hitting each other with their hats and saying, “That hurts!” and we get another lovely quote from David: “Today, I don’t think he’s worth a pinch of dog poop”.  These guys have some very colorful language as I’m sure everyone would agree. Unfortunately, David and Jeromy were unable to catch the Beast of the East.

In this episode, we learned that gators love the smell of dogs (coyotes) and wild hog. We learned that wild hogs smell really bad even when they are alive – they just smell bad naturally. David and Jeromy explained about the coyotes and the Texans explained about the hogs. Why did the Texans have to go catch a wild hog? Because they were hunting with their special marsh marinade which they put it on chicken that is not rotten. Unfortunately for them, the rain washed away all of the marinade leaving them with un-stinky chicken hanging on their lines. Naturally, the gators weren’t interested in it. So they went on a wild hog hunt which looked pretty fun. They found one after a while, and after a few shots Bigfoot finally hit it. They used the liver as bait and took the rest of the meat home to freeze.

RJ and Jay Paul were also on this episode and they caught pretty many gators. There isn’t too much to say about them, but they did have a good day hunting in the rain and lighting. In fact, they believed that the bad weather would help them rather than hinder them. At the start of their hunting day, Jay Paul said that he was “sure that we’ll catch some good ones”. They didn’t catch any huge alligators, but they did catch pretty many smaller ones.

Toward end the show, we were treated to an old Mitchell family recipe called “Swinging Chicken”. Bruce was making the treat for Tyler (Bruce’s dog)  and also for Ron and family. Tyler fell out of the boat while Bruce and Ron were hunting and scared Bruce to death so they went home taking the rest of the day off. Anyway, here’s how Bruce tells how to make Swinging Chicken: “Get an old coffee can, put some charcoals in it and wrap basically anything you want up in tin foil, hang it up in a tree or whatever,  just let it swing and let it cook, and that’s a swinging chicken.” (Just in case it isn’t obvious, the charcoals have to be red hot).

It looked like it made a real tender chicken and might be something we’d want to have on one of our camping trips. If we ever caught a fish we could eat, we could have a swinging fish.

UPDATE: A lot of people are asking for cook time. Here is a good video called  “Coffee Can Chicken”: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=78y7qlLPgpQ you can watch to hopefully help you feel a little bit more confident for your 1st Swinging Chicken. It takes 3 hours for a 3 lb chicken to cook. It’s lots of fun and tastes great. Good luck!

by John and Dink

Beast of the East Comedy Act – Swamp People Devoured Overview

The last episode of Swamp People is called “Devoured” because of the large sinkhole that has devoured part of Troy’s hunting grounds, but it was David LaDart and Jeromy Pruitt who stole this show, in our opinion.

We don’t like to make fun of people and we don’t like to be mean, so when we call this entry a comedy act, it’s because this episode has enormous entertainment value. David LaDart and Jeromy Pruitt are hot on the trail of the Beast of the East (which they say is 14 feet long) and because they only have to fill 50 tags for the season, they can really savor the hunt. They were both in high spirits and filled the air with some yuh, yuh, yuh-hoos. Jeromy felt “…like a possum running across a patch with his tail up in the air”.

They get to an area where they see signs of the Beast but they think the gator might be over the border of their hunting territory where they aren’t allowed to hunt. They decide to try to lure the gator into their territory with some extra rancid bait hung upwind so when the breeze comes through, the Beast will smell it.

The fun really begins after they hang their bait and go to sit in a hidden spot.  They pull out their secret weapon – an electronic speaker call which can play alligator sounds to attract the Beast. “It’s awesome”, says David, after Jeromy lets it rip. We were treated to alligator growls from a big male bull first and we were laughing pretty hard by now. The idea was to make the Beast of the East think there was another big bull around and come out to fight it, then smell the bait and get caught. They are both wanting really bad to get the gator on their hook and they looked pretty intense sitting in their boat playing those sounds.

After the male bull sounds, Jeromy played some baby alligator sounds. Next came some bellows – like bellowing for a mate. Something about seeing Jeromy and David sitting in that boat with those alligator sounds going is really hilarious. Finally, after 2 hours, the Beast of the East comes swimming within view and begins going towards their bait. They can’t believe it. When describing how he felt when he saw it, Jeromy did his “arm pump”. Then, David shows he is not a man who can keep his pants on. He can’t wait for the gator to get to the bait and possibly take it. Instead, he pulls out his pistol and tries to shoot it in open water. Unfortunately, he misses! Then, just as quick as it came, the Beast of the East begins heading back out.

Well, the boys decide to try to follow the Beast so that they can snag it. Unfortunately, the boat won’t start because their battery is dead. After cussing and blaming each other, they start talking about how big the Beast was and Jeromy started up with his arm pumps again. The whole scene is pretty hilarious and if you want to have a really good laugh, watch this episode on the History Channel website.

by John & Dink